What will it take for Canadians to rebel against the mismanagement of their hard-earned tax dollars?
Photo Credit: DoobyBrain.com

If you can’t tell right off the bat, I’m blatantly plagiarizing the not-yet-late and great Bob Dylan. But whereas Bob was talking about peace and love, I’m talking about pure old cash. That’s right. The evil force that makes our world go round (second most powerful force after gravity). You see, I’m getting exasperated folks. Unemployment rates are sky-rocketing while many individuals and businesses have been forced into bankruptcy because their money-making niche has flat-out disappeared. Governments are cutting back on social programs, dipping their hands into public coffers while denying the public of much needed community programs. Everyone’s running in the red. What is going on, we wonder. It’s a recession, we’re told. You and I both know that if I were to join the crusade of investigative journalism, all I would have to report are useless and senseless facts and figures which even the most uneducated person in Canada with a wit of common sense would disparagingly shake their head at. Not to mention a bunch of “did not return my call” and “refused to comment”. In the face of so much adversity, how can we possibly get at the truth?

Comparative theorizing is the answer I’ve come up with. Or in laymen’s terms, proposing theories (also known as speculating) and comparing them. Majority vote wins. I’ll go first.

My theory is that the global recession is a scam, that a group of big wigs holding a meeting on a private island somewhere decided that orchestrating a downturn in the world economy was exactly what they needed in order to jump-start their bank accounts. Similar to how war is a big money-maker for governments. But war has become very unpopular these days. Why, it’s enough to get a government kicked out of power! Global recessions, however, are an untapped wealth of deception and scheming. I can practically hear the Richie Rich’s of the world gleefully chuckling and rubbing their hands while the Scrouges swim in their tanks of gold coins.

Furthermore, if the people aren’t making enough money, and businesses aren’t making enough money, and the government isn’t making enough money, then isn’t it obvious that the communal well has run dry, that money is no longer growing on trees, that someone has emptied the bank? As our Canadian government grows more desperate, selling off more natural resources and exporting more jobs, in its useless attempts to fill the void, the joke is on them. Instead of filling the void, they are feeding it and the void is only growing bigger. The big wigs are laughing hysterically up their sleeves while drinking their 300-year-old champagne. I don’t know about you, but I’m scared enough to get political. Since I’m already a part of the dismal 64% of Canadians who vote federally, maybe I’ll run for office.

That’s my theory, what’s yours?

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Tags: canadian politics, cash, fraud, money

This entry was posted on Thursday, December 17th, 2009 at 8:13 pm and is filed under Economy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.